Forgiveness
by TippieTurtle
Summary: A one-shot depicting our favorite duo, Jamie and Eddie, and how they overcome their first serious disagreement as an engaged couple and as superior and subordinate. Set during the after the undercover operation went down.


Hello. It's been a while since I've written fanfic, but after watching Blue Bloods S9E04, I was somehow compelled to pen something down. This story touches on the thoughts of Jamie and Eddie and how they felt during and after the unfortunate undercover case Eddie was part of. I hope you enjoy this one-shot.

Disclaimers: (1) I do not own Blue Bloods in any capacity. (2) I am not profiting from this in any way, shape or form. (3) This is fanfiction and therefore an extension of already fictional characters. :)

XXX

The sun was just about to break the dawn when Eddie was finally done with all her paperwork. She stood up and walked to the small window on the far side of the room where the coffee maker sat, waiting for some of New York's finest to approach and reload on caffeine. Pouring herself a cup, she looked through the window, lost in thought. What a night. Her back felt sore from having been flung to the ground. A dull headache had started to creep up soon after the adrenaline began to taper off. Without realizing it, she rubbed the back of her head where the small bump had emerged from her hitting her head during the scuffle with the culprit.

"Hey," a familiar voice whispered. Eddie turned and there, almost to the point of invading her personal space, stood her Sergeant. Her best friend. Her fiancé.

"Hi," Eddie replied as she reminded herself that they were in the middle of the bullpen with colleagues and bosses surrounding them. "I'm going to submit my report and then head home," she added.

Jamie looked at her and for the hundredth time, thanked God that she came out of the UC operation mostly unscathed, save for some bruises. He was still fuming mad with Detective Davis for not taking more precautions and with himself for ... For what exactly, he was unsure. He simply knew he felt lousy. As if he had failed her somehow, as her fiancé and as her Sergeant.

Jamie nodded. There was so much left unsaid and had to be left unsaid while they were still on the clock and at work. That line in the sand they had erased not too long ago reappeared in a different context and a new set of boundaries formed. Both Jamie and Eddie had been confident they could navigate this new game. That nothing could rattle them. Jamie now realized that they were so wrong. He was prepared for the ups and downs, but he had not anticipated this curveball so soon. To say he was rattled was an understatement. He almost came undone when he confronted Detective Davis, and then again when he spoke with Eddie after the paramedic had finished examining her. He had to reign himself in quickly when he realized where they were and who might have been within earshot. But it was a struggle to keep his emotions in check. His voice had cracked slightly when he replied to Eddie's soft assurance that she was all right. "Jamie, I'm okay," she had said. Her gentle voice caressing his frayed nerves, seemingly to calm him and him alone. Jamie had not realized he needed to hear her soothing tone. The next thing he knew, she was offering him her hand. To have and to hold. He looked at her and accepted her peace offering, her comfort. He wrapped his hand around hers and allowed himself to feel relieved that she was all right. That they were both all right.

Thinking back to when it all went down, Eddie had not known how to react upon seeing Jamie at the scene of her UC operation. What the heck was he doing there anyway? In an instant, everything flashed before her. One moment, she was resisting the culprit and the next, she had been flung onto the ground and her body screamed at her, in pain. She saw stars as her brain registered the impact and sent the appropriate signals through her synapses and into her nervous system. Good gosh, it hurt. Then, she felt the weight of the culprit being pushed off her. She could hear voices shouting and hurried footsteps. It had all happened so fast.

Jamie. Her scout and protector. But damn it, she was working. And she knew, they knew, what they did was sometimes risky and dangerous. Why couldn't he leave her to do her job? He had been her Training Officer and she had learned from the best. So, why was he having trouble giving her the room she now needed to do this as she saw fit? She moved away from him after that to put some space between them. She needed that distance to regroup and simmer down.

After what seemed like forever, the kind paramedic had completed checking Eddie. As soon as she moved away from Eddie, Jamie came into view. He had been waiting patiently several steps away from the back of the ambulance. She knew he was not going to take his leave until they spoke. Leaving loose ends like that was just not his style. She had tried to call him out on his motives. And in turn, he defended his decisions. Then he had snapped and for a second, Eddie thought he was going to lose it right then and there. But he did not. He stopped himself and looked down to gather his wits. It dawned on Eddie that he was genuinely scared for her - as one of his officers and as his wife-to-be. He was having difficulty with their new boundaries. However, what he said in a fit also made sense. Professionally, he could not allow one of his officers to be physically hurt like that and had he not stepped in when he did, it might have escalated into something more serious. There was no way he was waiting for that to happen. How could he? In their heated exchange, Detective Davis had admitted to Jamie that he wanted to slap the perpetrator with assault charges. Davis was treading a very fine line and he knowingly put Eddie at risk. As her husband-to-be, there was no way in hell Jamie was going to let Eddie be manhandled and assaulted. Eddie saw the conundrum they were both in. She saw Jamie's fear in his eyes, heard it in his voice and felt it when their hands touched. The fear he felt rocked him to the core. There was no running from this new obstacle. They had to overcome it somehow. Together.

Now, back at the precinct, things were calmer and the boundaries were again set in place. Sergeant Reagan was checking on Officer Janko, making sure she was indeed all right before his shift was done. Silently, she told him she would wait for him at her place. She tilted her head, looked at him and wordlessly conveyed her request. She was tired, sore and in need of a good rest, with Jamie by her side. Jamie felt another wave of relief wash over him. He needed her as much as she needed him.

XXX

Jamie let himself in with the key Eddie had given him shortly after they got engaged. The drapes in her apartment were drawn to minimise the amount of light streaming in from the windows. Working nights was never easy but police work required it of them. In the darkness of night, while the majority of the people in New York City rested, bad things happened. Just like it did just hours ago. Jamie tried to push those thoughts out of his mind as he closed the door and locked it. He looked around and spotted Eddie on the couch. She was sound asleep, looking peaceful with her face scrubbed clean of makeup and in his old Harvard t-shirt which she had declared was now hers. He removed his shoes, placed his bag on the floor and made his way over to her. As he approached the couch, he saw a glass of water on the coffee table and a bottle of over-the-counter pain medication. He brow creased as a frown appeared on his face. He remembered how she had been thrown onto the ground and suddenly he could feel fear rising again in his blood.

"Jamie..." she said softly. "Hi. I'm sorry I fell asleep." Eddie tried to sit up and as she did, her face grimaced, giving away the fact that it hurt to move.

"No, don't. Just lay still. Where does it hurt?" Jamie asked. He knelt by the side of her couch and ran his hands over her arms to soothe and still her. Eddie let out a little laugh and replied, "I think the question is, where does it not hurt?" Her hand moved to the back of her head and Jamie's followed.

"Eddie, did you tell the paramedic about this? Do you need a doctor?" Jamie asked, worried.

"Yes, I told the paramedic and she said that it if the pain gets worse, I should call 9-1-1. But, Jamie, I'm okay. It hurts but it's not completely unbearable. I should probably ice it though." At that, Jamie walked briskly to the kitchen, grabbed the ice pack from the freezer and wrapped it in a fresh kitchen towel. He was going to have to keep a close eye on her while she recovered physically.

Eddie accepted the ice pack from Jamie and placed it over the bump on her head. Then she allowed him to gently guide her neck and head back onto the pillow. Oh, how she loved the way he was taking care of her. How she loved that she had his concern. As she settled back, her eyes found his and she reached for his hands.

"Jamie, I'm sorry," she whispered. Her eyes reflected peace and hope.

"I'm sorry too," Jamie said in reply. Slowly he leaned down and very gently touched his forehead to hers, his hands squeezing hers tenderly. After a while, Jamie pulled back and kissed Eddie softly on her forehead. "I love you, Eddie. So much," he whispered.

"I love you too, Jamie", Eddie said, her vision blurred as tears welled up in her eyes. "Thank you for having my back and being my cavalry."

Jamie held her gaze. This was all still very new to them. Working through this dynamic and having to make adjustments may gnaw at them, like it did for this case. The learning curve was steep but neither was going to back down. They were in it for the long haul. No retreat, no surrender. They would make mistakes along the way and probably step on each other's toes as they journey into this new aspect of their lives, both at work and at home.

"I trust you, Eddie. You know I do. Please forgive me for going about this all wrong. I could have prevented this from going as far as it did," Jamie whispered. He was almost afraid his voice would betray him again.

Eddie felt the tears in her eyes rolls down the sides of her face. "Will you forgive me?" Eddie asked, "For jumping to conclusions and not hearing you out?"

Both Jamie and Eddie nodded. Their first major disagreement as spouses-to-be was over. Both were grateful for that and for each other, their presence and commitment. Eddie tugged at Jamie's hands and he leaned in. His lips lovingly touched hers, gentle and assuring. Their kiss spoke of comfort, forgiveness, hope and most of all, love. All was right again.


End file.
